Friday, June 17, 2011

6 nights in lock up

Where do I begin?

I'm going to try my best to give the Cliff Notes version of my last week.  I may go back and add details later, but a week's worth of life is hard to completely relive.

Rewind to last Thursday, June 9.  At my nst and bpp, everything was going along fine, until they took my blood pressure.  It was up pretty high.  (might I add that it was elevated a bit at Monday's appt and at my md appt on Tues?)  We waited a bit and rechecked.  Still up.  The MFM got a hold of my OB and decided I should go to the hospital to have labs done and be monitored.  I cried.  I went home to meet up with Jamie and grab jammies and a few things "just in case".  I left it all in the car, though, as I didn't want to give them any ideas!

The babies continued to look great on the monitor, but my bp was climbing so they gave me a 100mg dose of Labetalol   (I was currently taking 100mg in the morning and 100mg at night).  They drew blood, and we waited.  The labs came back normal.  My bp wouldn't budge though.  They told be I could get dressed and go home around 8:30pm, so I got dressed and waited.  And waited.  And when the resident came in she informed us that I was going to be given betamethosone (a 2 round steroid shot to help speed up the babies' lung development).  The second shot would have to be given at the same time on Friday night.  I sort of sheepishly said, "No problem, I'll come back for the second one tomorrow night," as I smiled at her.  Oh, no, no.  I was being admitted because of my blood pressure.  They gave me yet another 100mg of Labetalol.  Jamie called our families and then went to get food for me.  I got the shot in my arm, and lemme tell ya- it hurt like hell.  It was a 22 gauge intramuscular deal, and you'd think that a girl who underwent 2 ivfs and a total of 5 transfers would be an old pro with shots, but that wasn't quite the case.  It hurt and it burned long after it was administered.  But with the 'roids now in my system, perhaps we'll have some sort of SUPER BABIES!  =)

So, I was admitted on Thursday night and didn't get discharged until Wednesday afternoon.  I did a 24 hour urine collection to check for protein on Friday, which came back at 302.  Below 300 is normal.  300-5,000 is abnormal.  Above 5,000 is severe and dangerous.  I repeated the collection on Sunday, and the protein went up to 336.  They were looking for a trend to see how quickly it was accelerating.  My ob wanted a repeat on Tuesday.  When I got the results on Wednesday, that was one of the deciding factors that I could go home, it dropped to 305.  I cried every single day I was there.  I had a lot of incredible nurses and only one crappy one who I demanded not be assigned to me again.  I got so many mixed signals from residents and doctors it made my head spin.  They explained to us how very important it would be to keep my little ones inside until 32 weeks (which is this upcoming Tuesday).  Many of the complications with preemies drop a great deal at this gestational age.  One of my obs said on Sunday that he was hoping I could keep them in for 1 maybe 2 more weeks before we'd have to get them out.  Now that my bp is under control (thanks to 900mg of Labetalol!!!  300mg, 3x a day) and my protein appears to be ok (at least for right now) and I I have no swelling or pain, maybe, just maybe I can carry my babies a little bit closer to term. 

On Saturday, we had gotten a tour of the nicu and were pointed out babies at different gestationsl ages because "it can be a bit alarming".  Seeing the nicu was very reassuring, but it made me pretty sad to thin how long my babies *could/ might* be in there.  But I know that that would be the very best place for them if being inside of me was no longer an option.  I get it.  It was just overwhelming and difficult to swallow. 

Ok, so for now I'm at home.  I have my list of IF __________, THEN YOU COME BACK.  IF _______, CALL YOUR OB.  I check my bp every few hours and it has held steady and been pretty good.  I realize that the medicine is just masking the problem and buying us some time, but that's ok.  I was also told not to panic if I end up having to come back, even if it's just for a night or two.  I started repacking my bag so this time I'll be ready, and not ahve to give Jamie lists every single day of what I need.  We're even throwing stuff for him inthe bag, because I'm hoping that the next time we go, in like 2 or 3 or 4  more weeks!!!, it'll be to have babies.

I know that there is so much more I want to share about my experience, but a lot of it is a blur in the aftermath.  If anything else meaningful pops into my head, I'll add it as a separate, add on post, otherwise, this is the gist of it.
For every one day I can keep my SnuggleBugs inside, it's about 3 days less that they'll need in the nicu.  So, here I am at 31w3d and going strong, just taking it one day at a time.  While 32 weeks is a big milestone and goal for us, I'm already so much better off today than I was at this time last Friday.  Each day is it's own goal that I'm thankful for and a celebration!

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