Monday, December 31, 2012

new year's eve

At this year draws to a close I sit here trying to reflect on how very blessed I am, but I am just so overcome with tears as all of my blessings come to mind- too many to even begin listing here, but I will certainly jot them down and tuck it in a safe spot as a friendly reminder for a rough day.  There were plenty of ups and downs this year, but as long as I have my family by me and we have our health, nothing else matters.  Here's to a safe, healthy, and happy 2013 for everyone!

Gabriella - 17 months old - loves being tickled, giving kisses,  and dancing

Benjamin - 17 months old - loves music, playing with trucks, and reading books

Friday, December 14, 2012


I'm at a loss for words.  My heart breaks for all of the families in Newtown.  I hope God sent down fleets upon fleets of angels to guide all of those innocent children and teachers Home.

Hugging Gabriella and Benjamin a little bit tighter tonight.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

World Prematurity Day

Today, November 17 is World Prematurity Day.  This year marks the second annual day of awareness worldwide.  This article is a decent place to start for raising awareness.  Over 15 million babies a year are born before 37 weeks.  The most shocking statistic for me though was that "along with stillbirths, prematurity claims the lives of about 4 million babies each year and is the leading cause of death in the newborn period."  

Gabriella and Benjamin were considered late term preemies at 34 weeks.  I realize that the differences between 24 or 25 week old preemies and my preemies are indescribable.  However, without serious medical intervention in the NICU at Christ Hospital for two full weeks for my sweet baby girl and for exactly one month for my brave little boy, I would not have them at home with me today.  I know this.  They absolutely would not have survived.  If not for the grace of God and the knowledge and skill of our medical team, our story would have ended in tragedy.

Gabriella Margaret - shortly after birth

my tiny Gabriella was such a trooper 

my first time feeding her, just 5 ml of breast milk was such a challenge for her

we were so blessed to be able to hold Gabriella about 10 hours after birth
Benjamin is in the incubator in the background, directly across from his sister

Benjamin Ryan - shortly after birth

my sweet Benjamin had to be stronger than any little baby should have to be

after 11 very long days, I finally got to hold my baby Benjamin in my arms, still intubated

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

on being thankful

It seems as though almost everyone is spending the month of November writing gratitude and thankful posts.  Although I deactivated my Facebook account days after Gabriella and Benjamin were born, I read a post from another blogger about how FB is being lit up with what people are blessed or thankful to have (all of the "blessed for my babies" were getting to her).  I think it's fantastic to publicly proclaim one's blessings.  I do.  I simply hope that they all appreciate who and what they have on a daily basis year-round.
If I were a better blogger perhaps I would have jumped on the bandwagon, too.  But I'm not a great blogger.  And lately I just don't feel like that great of a person.  I wake up every day and give the day everything I've got, but somedays I just have more to give than other days.  So, while I'm not documenting this month with the thirty things I am most thankful for, you better believe that I count my blessings each night.

My heart is heavy tonight for these two gals- Jenn (Stupid Stork passed the word along) and Leslie.  If you're the praying type, please add them to the list.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

pumpkin patch and Halloween

Last Friday we took Gabriella and Benjamin to a small, local pumpkin patch.  They really got a kick out of the straw maze!

And then yesterday, for Halloween, Gabriella dressed up as a pink birdie and Benjamin was a friendly dragon!

Thursday, October 18, 2012

play time, all of the time

We spend so.much.time. in the playroom.  The playroom is actually our dining room, but before we got Lucy we moved the dining room set to the basement and made the space into the babies' playroom.  Gabriella and Benjamin are growing so fast and changing so much!!  Here are a few pictures of an afternoon in the playroom this week:

Gabriella loves snuggling in laps and being tickled!  She loves watching Lucy outside from the playroom window and always shares lots of food off of her high chair tray with her puppy!!!

Benjamin loves reading books (especially the touch and feel truck board book), playing with his cars,  and giving kisses.  He is crazy about his puppy Lucy!!!

I just die when this baby girl flashes her pearly whites!
(15 months)

Benjamin's smile just melts my heart!
(15 months)

Daddy and the babies having some quiet time reading.

Mommy and Benjamin reading his new truck book.

Monday, October 15, 2012

October 15

Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. Today is the day we remember all the babies that left this earth way too soon.  If you're home tonight, please consider lighting a candle in remembrance of all of the little ones that are missed today and everyday, and to support their families.  At 7 pm (in all time zones) light that flame and keep it burning for 1 hour so there will be a continuous wave of light.  And if you're the praying type, please say an extra prayer of comfort for all of the mommies and daddies and families that have aching arms and hearts.